As time goes on and we grow from children to adolescents to adults, for many of us, somewhere along the way life begins to become routine. Day in and day out, whether we’re walking, driving, talking, eating, going to the grocery store, or spending time with our families, our minds get kicked into autopilot and continue to develop their habitual ways of thinking, interpreting, expecting, and relating to other people. However, these habits also include habits of the mind that can keep us stuck in stress, anxiety, depression, or even addictive behaviors. Here are a few habits of the mind and a mindfulness practice to help you break out of autopilot and gain more control over your life.
Three Common Habits That Sink Happiness:
Cultivating the ability to be more aware of these mind traps will help you break free from them and shift your attention to more effective ways of interacting with life. For example, if you notice catastrophizing, actually say to yourself “catastrophizing is happening right now,” then bring your attention to your breath for a moment to steady your mind. Next, ask yourself, “what are some other possible reasons why my heart is racing (e.g., I just ran upstairs, I’m nervous)?” If discounting the positive, come back to the breath, and then switch the “but” to an “and” so at least the positive statement get its equal weight, being more realistic and balanced. If blaming, call it out, say to yourself, “blaming is happening.” Remind yourself that blaming simply isn’t effective for anyone and then come back to your breath to steady your mind and return to the task you were just doing. This is not an easy process, yet an important one for regaining control from the ineffective thought habits we develop. If we’re not mindful in our daily lives, our minds could just fall into their habitual states to the point we’re on our deathbeds asking, “where did it all go?” Just check in with yourself during the day, look at the clock and say, “It’s X o’clock, do I know where my mind is?” You may catch yourself in some mind traps and if not, just notice whatever you are doing in the moment. Continue if you still want to be doing that or change if you’d rather be doing something else. Try to be patient through this process and not judge yourself if you find mind traps arising. Judging yourself as bad or wrong is another mind trap that keeps you stuck. Breathe in, breathe out, and just redirect your focus.